There's Nothing Wrong With Me: Duncan's Worst Films of 2011

Who wants to wallow in negativity at a time when there's so much to celebrate. I've been so busy with the bustle of catching up with the year's end that I haven't had the time or attention to comment on the films I've seen. If I had, it's only been on twitter, and if you're not following me there then you're sorely missing out. But the truth is that I didn't want to write a "Worst Films of 2011" list because that brings me back to the idea of this as a generally disappointing year, which it was for the greater part of the first nine months, for me anyway. I don't expect you to agree with any of the conclusions I've made in this list, and I don't want you to. You are free to hate me for my opinions, and I'll welcome it, but here what I have to say about the films before you do so.

Summer was a dour exercise I'd rather forget. It's worth mentioning that simple films like "Captain America", "Thor", and even "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" yielded more interest from me than the likes of "Super 8". The more appropriate name for this list would be "Most Disappointing of 2011", as much of what makes some of these films bad is the potential placed on them. Let me say that these are of the films I've seen. I didn't see everything, especially towards the end of the year, when I was especially busy catching up on what I did want to see. Sorry to "Horrible Bosses". You just missed the cut. So without further delay...

Carpet-Bagging: Animated Feature Submissions to 18

The Oscars continue their slow gallop to relevance within conversation, though we're still widely confused about what could and will happen in the races this year. But at least we can start making finite guesses about one particular race, that being the Best Animated Feature category. The list of submitted titles has been announced, and the two pics whose mere presence is worth talking about are "The Adventures of Tintin" and "Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked". Having not seen anything from the latter, and still assuming they're doing what they've always done, I'm kind of surprised, but I won't get too much into it. No way in hell it makes the shortlist. And I'm also curious about "The Smurfs", but that's under the same area as "Alvin".

"Tintin", on the other hand, almost has a guaranteed spot in the nominations. There's been a great deal of positive word after the film's UK opening this past weekend. I'd consider it amongst the frontrunners of this year, as there's even severe doubt that "Cars 2" will even be nominated. If I were to lay my guesses on the nominations here, assuming there's five, I'd say the other four slots would be filled by "Chico and Rita", "A Cat in Paris", "Kung Fu Panda 2", and "Rango" tied for the lead. But that's just a far off guess. Happy to hear any other theories. Comment away!

"The Adventures of Tintin"

"Alois Nebel"
"Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked"
"Arthur Christmas"
"Cars 2"
"A Cat in Paris"

Box Office Update: "Cowboys" Gets "Smurf"ed

I'm sorry Damon Lindelof, but you really shouldn't have brought it up in the first place. While some will gripe that both films opened about equally, Cowboys and Aliens had more potential and expectation going into this weekend, so the adequate opening weekend gross just doesn't match up. The Smurfs, on the other hand, played higher than it was expected or deserved to, so it's kind of the champion of this weekend, regardless of what Monday's numbers say. In other news, completely unrelated to the colossal debuts this weekend, Captain America dove 61% from last weekend, showing that it doesn't have quite the same staying power as Thor did in May.

Deathly Hallows: Part 2 continues to do really well despite the expected massive drop in its second weekend. Sadly, you can tell my disposition about the film from how I only refer to it as Deathly Hallows: Part 2, and not Harry Potter. Crazy, Stupid, Love is faring as you'd expect a standard rom-com to nowadays. The superior Friends with Benefits dipped precisely 50%, and should hopefully hold up better than the former. So expect the box office to hit a massive slump after this weekend, much like it did last year.

1. The Smurfs (First Weekend; $36.2 million)

2. Cowboys and Aliens (First Weekend; $36.2 million)

3. Captain America: The First Avenger (Second Weekend; $24.9 million)

4. Deathly Hallows: Part 2 (Third Weekend; $21.9 million)

5. Crazy, Stupid, Love (First Weekend; $19.3 million)

6. Friends with Benefits (Second Weekend; $9.3 million)

7. Horrible Bosses (Fourth Weekend; $7.1 million)

8. Transformers: Dark of the Moon (Fifth Weekend; $6 million)

9. Zookeeper (Fourth Weekend; $4.2 million)

10. Cars 2 (Sixth Weekend; $2.3 million)

Box Office Update: Victory for "America"

I'm still getting a weird sense of polarization after giving Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 a pan last weekend, and I almost gave Captain America: The First Avenger a decent review this weekend. Then I thought, "Did I really enjoy it more than Harry Potter?" Thank heavens I didn't, because this weekend is lining things up rather agreeably for most films. Captain America came in first, which was a tad surprising, but it's income was exactly as expected. Deathly Hallows: Part 2 was the one that took a pretty big tumble. It fell all the way down to $48 million from it's highest opening weekend ever.

So it looks like The Dark Knight is still moderately safe, and I'd attribute Potter's massive success to opening day madness. The films in that franchise always were a bit front-loaded in terms of income, but still pretty successful. Other than that, I'm not quite sure what else is big about this weekend. Friends with Benefits opened to third place, just below $20 million. That is a tad lower than its counterpart No Strings Attached, but that released during the most depressing time of the year in box office terms. People were looking for something mildly good, and it was only that.

1. Captain America (First Weekend; $65.8 million)

2. Deathly Hallows: Part 2 (Second Weekend; $48 million)

3. Friends with Benefits (First Weekend; $18.5 million)

4. Transformers 3 (Fourth Weekend; $12 million)

5. Horrible Bosses (Third Weekend; $11.7 million)

6. Zookeeper (Third Weekend; $8.7 million)

7. Cars 2 (Fifth Weekend; $5.7 million)

8. Winnie the Pooh (Second Weekend; $5.1 million)

9. Bad Teacher (Fifth Weekend; $2.6 million)

10. Midnight in Paris (Tenth Weekend; $1.9 million)

Box Office Update: "Hallows" Kills It

Well you can't say that the highest grossing motion picture franchise in history wasn't going to go out without making a huge dent in our wallets. This was inevitable since Friday, but Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 has broken The Dark Knight's opening weekend record by a clear $13 million. The film did earn most of that from the gargantuan Friday debut, but despite the fall from Friday to Saturday, it held on rather respectfully from Saturday to Sunday. It's to be seen how off that estimate is when the final numbers hit on Monday, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's a couple million up or down.

It's a massive accomplishment, but there were other milestones to be had this weekend. For starters, Transformers: Dark of the Moon became the first film of 2011 to bust past that pesky $300 million mark. I'll admit to playing a slight hand in that, as I saw the film a second time last evening. Both Horrible Bosses and Zookeeper held on honestly, as no threatening new comedies entered the market. That'll change when Friends with Benefits swings around the corner next weekend.

The most shocking failure of this weekend was poor Winnie the Pooh, which landed in sixth place with only $8 million. People complaining that their childhood was over after Potter debuted were clearly looking in the wrong place. My favorite success of the weekend, however, was Midnight in Paris, reentering the top ten this week just in time to blow past Hannah and Her Sisters to become the highest grossing Woody Allen film to date. So obviously this weekend at the box office was an improvement (a 46.4% improvement at that) upon last year, when Inception opened to the top spot.

1. Harry Potter...Deathly Hallows: Part 2 (First Weekend; $168.5 million)

2. Transformers: Dark of the Moon (Third Weekend; $21.2 million)

3. Horrible Bosses (Second Weekend; $17.6 million)

4. Zookeeper (Second Weekend; $12.3 million)

5. Cars 2 (Fourth Weekend; $8.3 million)

6. Winnie the Pooh (First weekend; $8 million)

7. Bad Teacher (Fourth Weekend; $5.2 million)

8. Larry Crowne (Third Weekend; $2.5 million)

9. Super 8 (Sixth Weekend; $1.9 million)

10. Midnight in Paris (Ninth Weekend; $1.8 million)

Box Office Update: "Bosses" Rise Against "Moon"

Forgive me if things have been too silent for your liking lately. Balancing my work online and an actual job is a bit of a chore, and some things rightly take a back seat. I promise that things will pick up considerably after the summer, but you can expect things to be slow around this time of year. Obviously the box office is not one of such things, so that's something I'll always comment on. As for this particular weekend, nothing is truly changed or different. Transformers: Dark of the Moon remains the one to beat for the year, though that could certainly change very soon.

Michael Bay's trilogy capper fell a heavy 52% from its giant debut, and it raises a question of how much higher than $300 million it will reach domestically. Still, the film is performing quite admirably given the constant assault of critical backlash. I realize I never did weigh in on the film, so I'll take just a moment to give my thoughts. It's perhaps the worst film of the entire series, but it's also the most enjoyable, stupidly hilarious, and just plain fun films I've seen in a long time. I enjoyed Revenge of the Fallen more than Transformers, and I enjoyed Dark of the Moon even more. Call me insane, but that's my standing on the matter.

In the meantime, comedic films tried to add an inch of levity to the summer, and somewhat successfully if you look at the money charts. Horrible Bosses, which I hear has received a handful of good reviews, would've reigned champion this weekend if it weren't for Bay's machines. Zookeeper, was the weaker of the two, but give it credit for inching just above the $20 million mark this weekend. Cars 2 is taking smaller drops now, but I'd expect it to end below even Ratatouille, one of Pixar's toughest sells. Rounding out the top five is Bad Teacher, which I saw and was somewhat appalled by on Thursday. Still, it's been holding on well, and could make it to $100 million if all continues as it is. Sure, the weekend was down from last year when Despicable Me placed first, but expect an uptick in good time.

1. Transformers: Dark of the Moon (Second Weekend; $47 million)

2. Horrible Bosses (First Weekend; $28.1 million)

3. Zookeeper (First Weekend; $21 million)

4. Cars 2 (Third Weekend; $15.2 million)

5. Bad Teacher (Third Weekend; $9 million)

6. Larry Crowne (Second Weekend; $6.3 million)

7. Super 8 (Fifth Weekend; $4.8 million)

8. Monte Carlo (Second Weekend; $3.8 million)

9. Green Lantern (Fourth Weekend; $3.1 million)

10. Mr. Popper's Penguins (Fourth Weekend; $2.9 million)

Box Office Update: Under Light of "Moon"

It seems like the box office is thriving, with another major hit having taken a huge chunk of the earnings this weekend, be it one that we expected. To be honest, I would have expected bigger numbers from Transformers: Dark of the Moon, but I guess the weak(er) start had to do with the general anger towards the second film. As most know, I quite enjoyed the second film, and I quite enjoyed the third film for the same basic reasons. It's big, loud, stupid, hilarious, honest, and quite obviously beautiful. Every artist has a certain style, and Bay's is with the degenerate and flashy. You can't simply watch this film and lump it in with the crowd of failing blockbusters.

Cars 2 took a massive drop from last weekend, by far the largest drop of any Pixar film, but there's no surprise there. Larry Crowne failed on impact, not making a huge dent with the opposite demographic of Transformers. Monte Carlo also didn't make a big impact, but it did well for what was expected of it. That's the main thing you can say about it, is that it did exactly what it was expected to do, and that's fine. In the scheme of total grosses, Bridesmaids passed the $150 million point, which I'm quite happy about. Pirates 4 passed $1 billion worldwide, which I'm not at all happy about. It certainly puts Alice in Wonderland in perspective in terms of quality.

1. Transformers: Dark of the Moon (First Weekend; $116.4 million)

2. Cars 2 (Second Weekend; $32.1 million)

3. Bad Teacher (Second Weekend; $17.6 million)

4. Larry Crowne (First Weekend; $15.7 million)

5. Super 8 (Fourth Weekend; $9.5 million)

6. Monte Carlo (First Wekend; $8.8 million)

7. Green Lantern (Third Weekend; $8 million)

8. Mr. Popper's Penguins (Third Weekend; $6.9 million)

9. Bridesmaids (Eighth Weekend; $4.4 million)

10. Midnight in Paris (Seventh Weekend; $4.3 million)

My Beef With "Cars 2"

Rather than put forth a typical review for Cars 2, I'm opting for something a little different. Mostly because I don't feel like going into extreme detail about the film, but I still wanted to let out my anger at why it's such a horrific failure. I'm no huge fan of Cars, but it does have its considerable moments, and I hoped that that might be the stem that John Lasseter was drawing from for the sequel. The thing is, this is a complete and total betrayal of what the first film meant, and perhaps of what this particular series is about.

They could've gone a considerable amount of routes for this sequel, continuing the story from the first film with an emotional tie to continuing the arc of these characters. Unfortunately, Cars 2 wasn't a continuation of anything so much as a rehash of characters and situations. As is the foil of a great many Pixar films, it does a complete 180 and makes it an action spectacle. This isn't just placing an action plot at the end of the film to enhance the already laid out story, much like WALL-E or Up. This is a full fledged action spy film.

Every line that is delivered drops like a ton of bricks, being too obvious and self-indulgent to take seriously. I didn't care about the characters of McQueen or Mater, and I still don't. If I were to make a list of the absolutely worst Pixar characters, they'd land somewhere on that list. Paul Newman's death was bound to make an impression on the plot, but it's a side note rather than an emotionally resonating plot point that enhances the characters' viewpoints on the world. Wasted potential is a word I use quite often in these cases.

Box Office Update: "2" Fast. Not Furious.

Seriously, what the hell is wrong with this summer? We've gone on so far without anything being truly exceptional, that I'm honestly playing quite the pessimist. I'm honestly kind of excited for Transformers: Dark of the Moon to lift me out of this rut I've been stuck in. That's not to say that films haven't been mildly successful. Green Lantern looks to be the only unmitigated failure of the blockbuster summer thus far. Things have been on a downward slope for Cars 2 all week, and yet it still displays an honorable total for this weekend.

I'm not surprised, as kids were greatly pleased with Hop a few months back, so why on earth would they not be even more pleased with Cars 2? The film beat low expectations to take the top spot with $8 million more than the previous film's opening. It's still to be determined how well the film plays in the long term, but there isn't much to draw away the kid crowd in the next month, so I'd say the film's prospects are strong. Now, the other new releases would usually be a non-factor, but Bad Teacher put up a fantastic opening north of $30 million, which is spectacular for a comedic venture like that.

Aside from that, there's not much to this weekend's box office. Green Lantern took a nosedive of nearly 65%, and looks like it's going to be a total failure. Super 8 is currently en route to doubling its budget of $50 million. Overall, the weekend was up a good 8% from last year, so things might be taking a turn for the better after Green Lantern's failure.

1. Cars 2 (First Weekend; $68 million)

2. Bad Teacher (First Weekend; $31 million)

3. Green Lantern (Second Weekend; $18.4 million)

4. Super 8 (Third Weekend; $12.1 million)

5. Mr. Popper's Penguins (Second Weekend; $10.3 million)

6. X-Men: First Class (Fourth Weekend; $6.6 million)

7. The Hangover: Part II (Fifth Weekend; $5.9 million)

8. Bridesmaids (Seventh Weekend; $5.4 million)

9. Pirates 4 (Sixth Weekend; $4.7 million)

10. Midnight in Paris (Sixth Weekend; $4.5 million)

The Weekend Report: Running on Empty

We're now just about at the mid point of the summer box office season, and I can say that things aren't entirely that spectacular from what we've seen. The fact that Thor is thus far the highlight of my blockbuster summer speaks volumes of how deeply disappointed I am. New installments in the Pirates, X-Men, and Hangover franchises have proved dismal, and just as dismal were films like Green Lantern, for which there was no hope heading in. At this point, I'm in deep need of a healthy jolt of optimism. Something to make me say, "Things are finally getting better!" I usually expect Pixar to supply me that, but this sadly isn't their year.

It was never going to be their year, as they were always going to turn out their sequel to Cars this year, and we all knew precisely what that meant. It meant the return of a bunch of characters that we honestly couldn't care less about the first time, only this time John Lasseter is upping the action to the level of spy film. From an audience's perspective, one could be optimistic about the opportunities of this one. Still, reviews have been mixed to negative, which is as much I expected from the start of the project, so why is everyone all that surprised? The film should still do good business this weekend, with kids eagerly heading in to see absolutely anything, but they'll be much more enthused to see Cars 2. Why? Because every kid plays with cars.

It's sad that the favorable option of this weekend is something like Bad Teacher, which made my Dread Locks list where Cars 2 did not. I never expected the film to get good reviews, and I always knew I'd see it anyway. Why? Because it's the sort of film that doesn't rely on favorable reviews. You couldn't watch the trailer and say that it looks like a good film. It looks like a really entertaining comedy in the most basic of ways. I'm not looking for art. I'm not looking for quality. I'm looking to shut my brain off for an hour and a half and chuckle like a doofus. So what are you looking to see this weekend? What did you think of whatever you did see? What's your favorite summer film so far? I'd like to know the sort of people who read my words.

For Your Anticipation: A Little Too Much Chatter

Remember when I was being optimistic about Cars 2? I think the time for that has passed entirely, as the film has been receiving a surprising critical bashing. The problem is that it's impossible to tell at this point if all these pans have been from mere disappointment, or if the film is just really bad. While I'd like to think the former, it's probably the latter. I thought Pixar had the sense to always worry about the story first and foremost, but this seems like a simple action cash-grab. If you're going to make a sequel, at least be loyal to what made the first one a success.

Films to See in 2011: June

I have had a joyfully optimistic entrance into this Summer with May, so it's a rather large disappointment to go from that to the June slate. All of the films that I have been looking forward to in June are coming out in the first two weeks. That leaves a pretty sizable mess of the following two weeks. Jim Carrey is adding yet another pointlessly irritating performance to his repertoire with Mr. Popper's Penguins. Pixar could potentially break their tradition of wonderfully heart filled entertainment with Cars 2. I'm still not sold on Green Lantern, nor do I expect to be so in the following weeks. Luckily, we do have some films waiting to invigorate audiences before this downward slope.

3. Beginners

Directed by Mike Mills

Like most films at this spot, I'm not relentlessly waiting for this film to come out, no pun intended. More can be said of this film than simply saying that it's better than most of what's out there. I'd say that Ewan McGregor, Melanie Laurent, and Christopher Plummer are signs of something great, but everybody has their respective pitfalls. What has me so interested in this film is the witty personal nature of the piece. It's not a broad comedy by any definition, and it focuses on very real and interesting emotions. When you take on a subject such as this, and one that's really never been touched upon, you raise several interesting questions. If director Mike Mills does a good job answering them, he's got something great here.

Dread Locks: June 2011

Another piece that went up in glorious flames during the "Blogger Maintenance Massacre of 2011", as I will call it, I had already gone on about the expected upsets of this coming month. There's always a promise of some sort of substantial failings, either expected or unexpected. And yet, I found myself so strictly confined while figuring out what films to have people vote for this month. The Art of Getting By looks like the most horrible indie flick I've ever heard of, but there's little chance anyone's ever heard of it. At the time, I was halfway committed to slapping Cars 2 in there, and I didn't because of the long-term respect I have for Pixar. After seeing the latest semi-redeeming trailer, I'm glad I made that call.

The most difficult film not to throw in there was Green Lantern, because every scrap of marketing for that film hits me like a brick to the head. There has been such banal optimism towards the film that it makes me sick, because whatever hope there is towards it is reminiscent of Avatar. I'd be a little more faithful if the film looked as good as Avatar and not Fantastic Four. I have every reason to lump this one in the poll, but I know that if I did then absolutely everyone would vote for it. Then it becomes a popularity contest, and I have pretty much secured my place in the theater for a film I really don't want to see.

Theatrical Trailer: "Cars 2"

Across the past few months, I've gradually come to grips with the fact that this is not a good year for Pixar. If you're familiar with the site, you'll know that every single bit of new footage has painted this film as stupid, corny, and actually useless. Cars 2 has abandoned some of the deeper themes that made the first film something of a success, even if it is widely known as the worst in the Pixar catalog. And yet, this trailer forced me to ease up on the hatred a bit, because all of the stupidity and foolishness that Mater's been up to has actually been worked into the plot. There's the bitter truth to the fact that Mater is dumb, and if Pixar has realized that flaw, all the nonsense could just be seen as them embracing it. Is the film suddenly on the top of my list? Of course not, because that song slapped on the end of the trailer is just atrocious. That being said, I've gone from not wanting anything to do with this film to actually being willing to see it.

Digital 3D in Summer 2011

I feel like the film industry has learned some valuable lessons in terms of using Digital 3D in film. I am, personally, an affable fan of the technique just so long as it is done correctly. It's like really good chocolate, but you can still overdo it. This Summer has found a certain measure of moderation, with X-Men: First Class, Super 8, and Cowboys & Aliens all opting out of Digital 3D. I think it's a worthy rule that if your film isn't just standard popcorn fare that you shouldn't go for 3D. In the meantime, there are some films that you could easily see in 2D without complaint. I'll try to give you a decent idea of which films would be worth the extra three bucks.

May

Thor - Post-conversion, but deals with epic celestial realms. Probably still majestic and preferable in 2D.

Priest - Not in 3D. Not in 2D. Not on DVD. NOT EVER!

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides - Promising visuals from Rob Marshall in service of a less than spectacular screenplay. If you see it at all, go for 3D.

Kung Fu Panda 2 - Heartfelt animation from Dreamworks, so definitely worth 3D.

June

Green Lantern - It's practically an animated film, and the superhero was made for 3D. Should attract the same fans as Avatar, so you'll see it in 3D either way.

Cars 2 - If it's not in the sky, it's not worth your time. If you see Pixar's latest, see it in 2D.

July

Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Sparks, explosions, clanging metal, and more explosions. Shut your brain off and see it in frantic 3D glory!

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 - I'm completing the journey in 2D. You should too.

Captain America: The First Avenger - Seems to evoke the film I would have died to see in 3D, Star Trek, so go for the glasses.

The Smurfs - Seriously? Don't even bother.

Theatrical Trailer: Cars 2

Three trailers in, and there's still no real sign of hope for Pixar's next film, Cars 2. I've really said all I can say about this film already, and not much has changed. This isn't anything new, nor is there much chance of it being emotionally effective. Still, I hold out hope because it features the voice of Michael Caine and the music of Michael Giacchino. Prospects are bleak.

Television Trailer: Cars 2

After three trailers, I am now officially pessimistic regarding Pixar's twelfth feature, Cars 2. I had maintained optimism earlier because of their fantastic track record, but this actually looks kind of stupid, which is something I rarely say of the studio. I'm trying to keep hope alive, but it's really hard to. I think that the character of Mater can very much be acquainted with Hiro from the now failed television show Heroes. He started out endearing, but is just stupid and annoying at this point. In fact, that could be said of this particular series. I'm not going to say it's over until it's over, but this doesn't inspire confidence.

Teaser Trailer: Cars 2

Michael Giacchino is writing the score for a spy movie... sort of. I'm not going to lie. This film has the potentially to permanently break the Pixar winning streak, and it's most likely going to happen. I shouldn't doubt the greatest animated studio in the world, but Cars 2 rather looks like they're taking a break from meaningful and thought provoking films, and opting instead to just make a film for fun. I wish I could completely get behind this, but I simply can't yet. However, I must admit that I did chuckle at Mater's reply to Finn McMissile. Take a look and let me know what you think.

Teaser Trailer: Cars 2

It's going to be a long wait until next July, and frankly, I'm fine with that. It's not that often that I'm not at all excited about a Pixar film. It's depressing that Cars 2 is likely to be the exception to the winning streak of Pixar. This short teaser for their next film is somewhat amusing, but I look for Pixar films to be deep and brimming with emotional quality. Cars just doesn't have that, and I'm going to place a bet that the sequel will have no more. Take a look at the trailer and comment on your own thoughts from it.